


If you stay, I ´ll stay

by LavenderPillow



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Adventure & Romance, Chapter 3: Clemens Point (Red Dead Redemption 2), F/M, Falling In Love, Love, POV First Person, POV Original Female Character, POV Second Person, Reader-Insert, Red Dead Redemption 2 Spoilers, Slow Burn, Video Game: Red Dead Redemption 2 (2018)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 06:28:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28987824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LavenderPillow/pseuds/LavenderPillow
Summary: Alice is a member of the Van Der Linde gang but has been in prison for a year so she hasn´t met Micah or witnessed the blackwater incident. She returns when they´re in Clemens Point.....- What did dutch want? Micah asks.I think about our night together that was just a few hours ago, and decide to throw him off guard.- Well... he  told me I shouldn´t let Micah Bell  cum inside me.Micahs face drops.- I´M JOKING, I say putting my hands up.- Reeeal funny he says, I did it because you was begging me last night darlin. He pushes me up against the tree, kissing me.- Reeal funny i say and hug him
Relationships: Arthur Morgan/Reader, John Marston/Reader, Micah Bell & Original Female Character(s), Micah Bell/Reader, Micah Bell/You
Kudos: 59





	1. Chapter 1

**_..a few weeks earlier..._ **

It was a long trip to the camp. Uncle and Susan picked me up in a wagon. It felt like I´ve been away for 5 years when Susan tells me whats happend in the year I´ve been in prison. 

  
\- Really, Davey is dead? - Noo, i say quietly as my head drops, - Noooo. 

  
We drove fast all night, and by morning , uncle slowed down the wagon .The camp is by the water. Beautiful. I see Jack , oh my god Jack! Abigail and Jack runs up to me and gives me a hug. I see Dutch at his tent. Smiling, he´s walking over to the wagon. 

  
\- Alice, you´re back! welcome my dear! he pulls me in to a hug. 

  
\- Are you a changed woman? 

  
\- What do you think Dutch, I say. 

  
\- Ha!, That´s good Alice, i know you, he says and taps me on the shoulder. - Your tent is ready and your belongings are there, what we managed to save that is. 

  
\- Welcome to the south Alice, Sean says and hands me a beer. 

  
\- Where are we??

  
\- Rhodes, near Saint Denis, people are crazy here but we have a big score planned.

  
I smile at him and walk over to John and Javier. 

  
\- Been a long time, John says. 

  
\- Sure has.

  
\- Alice! Javier says, we missed you.

  
\- I missed you all . Was even glad to see Uncle I say with a wink, - And that´s saying something!

  
I spend the rest of the night talking to all of the people I´ve missed dearly and the people that is new to me. Molly, Kieran, Sadie, Charles and Lenny. They seem like nice people. 

  
I go to my tent, lay on the cot and start to think about the long two days I´ve had....

  
Alice thinks about how the prison guard looked at her, angry:

  
\- Be sure you behave now, i don´t wanna see you again you hear? 

  
\- Sure thing mister, i will be on my best behaviour from now on. Find a husband and settle down and not be involved with bad men again , she said with a fake voice and smiled big. - Promise! 

  
How she signed the paper stating her prison release and was let out the front gate, paper in hand. The rain poured down.

  
The paper gets wet and almost dissolves in her hand so she puts it in her bag. Puddles are formed around her lace up boots. Her gray skirt with ruffles at the bottom is now dark gray and the more it rains the higher up the dark grey appears. Thunder roars up in the mountains. She waits. 

  
Then finally, far away a dot appears. Is it really them? My "uncle and aunt" who visited me in prison? They made sure to tell the prison workers that I had just followed a bad crowd and that I didn´t have a bad bone in me. If they only knew. The dot became bigger and of course, I see Susan and Uncle on a wagon.

-They came. They want me back, the gang wants me back! she thinks and starts walking to the wagon.

  
\- Alice, uncle says with a smile. 

  
\- You came, she said.

  
\- Of course we did Alice, Susan says. We´re family. Now come on, get on the wagon it´s a long drive to our camp. 

  
Alice sleeps so good she doesn´t wake up until lunch the next day. Susan has washed her favourite dress and she finds it folded with a flower laid on top of it. She puts it on. Her hair is put up on the top of her head and she steps out in to the camp. 

  
Arthur brings her a cup of coffe and she thanks him and walks towards the campfire and sits down. She smiles and nod at Charles who drops logs on the ground near the fire. He nods back. 

  
She turns to arthur: 

  
\- So these people are new additions to the gang? Someone that stands out or that i should be aware of? 

  
\- Ummm nooo he says and she can tell he´s lying. 

  
\- Tell me!

  
\- I ain´t telling you nothing , he says. You´ll see. 

_**A few hours later** _

  
\- Absolutely not! Dutch interups me. - I will tell you when you can come with us on this score. And besides, me and Hosea has a lead on both these families.

  
I sigh and continue to drink my beer. 

  
Bill rides in to camp, along with another man on a black horse. I notice a white hat. Blonde hair sticking out between his hat and leather jacket. They approach us. 

  
\- Micah! You´ve been away too long, she´s here now, Dutch calls out to him 

  
He sees me and smirks, walks towards me with his head tilted to the side.

  
\- So yooou´re Alice? Dutch told me maaany stories about how good of an outlaw you are. He clears his throat.- But he failed to mention that you are the most beautiful woman in this camp..

  
\- Well , I say and look down on my hands then back up at him. Dutch told you the important bits then. I smile at him . 

  
....silence.... 

  
Finally Bill breaks the silence; 

  
\- Well, Dutch, aren´t you gonna ask us about the score? He waves a stack of money in his hand. 

  
I excuse myself and walk away. 


	2. Chapter 2

_I was caught by the law on a failed bank job with Davey._ _We were escaping a small town bank on a wagon, I was at the back and shot at lawmen._ _I fell off the wagon but Davey never noticed until he came back to camp. I miss him.  
_

_Such a mess everything; the blackwater incident, Davey and Mac dying and Sean being captured by bounty hunters. At least Sean was rescued and is alive._ _Arthur tried to tell me everything that happened but I can´t believe it, it sounds unbelivable._

  
_The girls updated me about things in camp. Molly doesn´t talk to us much but she seems ok. Sean and Karen are still a thing and it makes me happy. John and Abigail are...well.... they act the same as before I left. So nothing new there._

  
_Micah..the girls didn´t tell me anything about him.. He seems so confident at night, sitting by the fire telling stories on how he saved Dutch´s life and how he lived his whole life as an outlaw. Talking about his father and his father, both named Micah Bell. Making a dramatic ending and walking away into the dark night._ _He never sleeps but he also never volunteers as camp guard. He would be perfect guarding the camp at night._ _Unless he´s in one of his moods and lashes out at people, he´s quiet and almost invisible at camp at daytime_

 _But I see him. If he´s not by the tree then he´s by Dutch´s tent or at the campfire. Always sharpening his knife or cleaning his guns. He is quiet when he´s not rude._ _I´m also rude to people..._

 _..Was..I was rude..._ _Hell I was rude to Karen many times, and she didn´t deserve it most times....._ _And John too, but he deserves it almost every time.._ _Even though i´m one year older than him he acts like my big brother. Annoying brat. But I love him as a brother, and Arthur. I´ve been with the gang so long they´re my family now.  
_

  
_Days go by in camp. Hosea and Dutch are away from camp alot and Arthur is nowhere to be seen as usual. But when he visits the camp he unloads so much cash I don´t wanna think about what he´s been doing._

_I try to listen to Hosea to work on my temper and not lash out at people who doesn´t deserve it. I wanna change and want a chance to change._

_Change is a powerful thing as Hosea would say._


	3. Chapter 3

Micah is sitting by the table close to my tent, sharpening his knife. He´s so into that, so he doesn´t see me standing in front of him.

  
\- Hey Micah

  
He is startled by me calling his name so he sits up and coughs. He´s clearly drunk. 

  
\- What do you want? he gives me a bad look.

  
\- Nothing, just wanna talk to someone. 

  
I sit down at the table. A few seconds of silence.

  
\- Your horse is beautiful. what´s his name? 

  
He glares at me for a few seconds..... 

  
\- Baylock.

  
\- Thats a beautiful name for a beautiful horse I say and smile. When did you join us? 

  
\- About 6 months ago. How long have you been with these fooolks?

  
\- Oh, about 10 years now. A long time. 

  
He makes me blush for some reason. 

  
\- 10 years huh? .....How old are you? he says

  
He puts his feet on the table in front of him. His confidence is back.

  
\- I´m 27. What about you mr Bell?

  
\- "Mr Bell" he says under his breath. He sneers at me.

  
\- Soooo, who you been with here in camp? Javier? Arthur? Sean? I hear you are close with Abigail and I know what she´s been up to. Not just John is what I heard.

  
\- wha...eh..who..EXCUSE MEE?!?!?!

He´s laughing at me now.

  
\- You heard me sweetheart, just wanna know before I go any further.

  
His voice is low in his chest: 

  
\- I heard about you being a baaad outlaw.

  
He puts his feet down and grins an evil smile, puts his knife in his hands and testing the sharpness with his fingers. 

  
\- Ahh I see right through you Mr Bell I finally say _(but I should have walked away)_ , you are just trying to test me. I see you around camp, always looking but never approaching. I know your type ... If this was one year ago, I would have jumped over this table and hit you before you even knew what happend. Right between the eyes Micah!

  
\- Is that soooo? He doesn´t look at me, his eyes is on his knife

  
\- Yes it is, how dare you say this to me ??? 

  
\- Ok then have a good day he says and flaps his hand at me like you would send a dog away.

He´s finished talking to me, I can tell I´m boring him with me defending myself.

  
I stand up to walk away. Anger is burning in me so when I am just about to walk past him I grab the knife from him and and tap it against his shoulder as I´m talking :

  
\- I don´t ever want to explain myself, and I know Dutch never said anything of what you just said to me. But if you would like to know I never been with anyone in the gang and don´t ever wanna be, you just made me realise this even more

  
I toss the knife on table and walk away. 

The next morning I walk back to camp, having just finished my morning coffe, sitting at my favorite place by the water .

  
-You calmed dooown now? Micah says as he stands by the tree near Strauss wagon.

  
-What do you mean? 

-It got a little heated yesterday, don´t you think? You should show me some respect Alice...

  
-........Why are you like this? _(I try to sound calm)_

  
-I´m the one talking here, he says, and shifts his weight from the tree to his feet.

  
-Answer me Mister Bell, why are you like this? I have been nothing but nice to you since I met you? 

  
-I saaaid that you should show some respect. Or do you want me to tell Dutch about your attitude? Huh? 

-You tell him whatever you want Mr Bell, I got 10 years over your 6 months I say and smile at him. 

  
For the second time in 24 hours, I´m walking away from him. I see Karen and she has witnessed our conversation.

  
\- Relax Alice, just ignore him.... Hey, you heard about the bank job in Valentine? I got to do my drunken harlot again she says and takes my hand guiding me to where Tilly and Mary-Beth is sitting. 

  
-Ha, you always play the best drunken harlot, I say. 

  
As we walk away I look over my shoulder and catch Micahs stare, he immedietly looks away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is supposed to be a Reader insert story, but I added the name Alice because I personally don´t like stories with Y/N or ____ instead of name. Let me know if you have any feedback for me.


	4. Chapter 4

Dutch and Micah are in the parlour house in Rhodes, celebrating a new lead of the supposed hidden gold that may or may not exist.

  
\- So Micah, what do you say? Dutch says, clearly in a good mood. 

  
He pours two shots of whiskey.

  
\- About what boss?

  
\- About anything. Rhodes, this lead , Alice is back. How are you two getting along bytheway? 

  
\- Hmm.. About the same as anyone in camp I guess. Tell me Dutch; what´s her story? When you told me about her I imagined some kind of Black Belle type woman...

  
\- Ha well, you could almost say she´s the Black Belle of our camp. You can send her out looking for leads and come back with more than you wished for. She handles a gun as good as any man. If you have a chance to be out and rob with her you would see that she is fearless.

  
\- I´ve noticed that Javier likes her. Maybe more men do? She´s a fine woman. Micah says

  
\- Ohohoh Dutch chuckles, you don´t know how wrong you are Micah. Javier sure has tried, and maybe someone else too. But she always turned men down. 

  
He´s quiet for a moment. 

  
\- She did have one man that she liked though, some years ago. Hosea and her worked with him. But he lied to her and mistreated her. He left her after their robbery was done. John and Arthur found out that he had hurt her so they hunted him down before he left town and beat him. The whole gang found out and we all cheered when John and Arthur came back to camp. After that she never got involved with a man again to my knowledge. Must have been at least 5 years ago.. 

  
Dutch went quiet again, remembering what it was like when it was just a few of them in the gang.

  
\- Oh...was all Micah could say. Oh...... another whiskey Dutch, for the leeead?

The next night Micah was about to go to his spot outside of camp, mainly to be left alone, when he noticed Alice sitting by the water. She was drinking whiskey, eating her favourite; canned strawberries and combing her hair .

He thought about how cruel he had been to her a few days ago. He wanted to get a reaction out of her of course, that´s why he had been so awful to her. That´s usually the way he greets women. 

But she had approched _him_ , not vice versa. She wanted to talk to him.

  
He always thinks the worse of women for some reason. His father never had a soft spot for them either.

  
Micah never feels guilty and of course he doesn´t feel it now , but the way she stood up for herself made him think about her in a new way. People need to earn Micahs trust, its just the way he is. He usually never sees any good in people , only what he can steal from weak people. But she was not weak. Not at all. She had proven herself to him, and he liked the fact that she didn´t take any shit from him. He laughed to himself, looking at her, shaking his head. 

  
**The next day**

  
The smell of camp fire, damn I missed this, Alice thinks to herself. And whiskey...the taste and smell of whiskey is a gift sent from above .

I hear Swanson talking to Tilly about how he lost his mind taking opium and she tries to listen to his ramblings. I walk over to Pearson and grab some stew.

I walk back to the table seeing Tilly is gone. Swanson is still there , but Micah is talking to him. I sit down and concentrate on eating. 

  
\- You don´t have to worry about gods wrath mister bell, I hear swanson say.

  
\- Sure as hell I don´t Reverend. Hate to break it to you but there is no man up in the sky watching over you.

  
\- I am in a bad place now but god always has a plan, and I trust his work to be done. I am a child of god Micah and unfortunetly so are you.

  
\- No, what you are, reverend, is a loser on opium who is delusional, there´s no saving you.... And I´m glad, Micah says waving his knife soflty as he talks to Swanson.

  
\- What do you think Alice, Swanson leans over to me. Micah looks at me waiting for me to answer. I swallow hard. 

  
\- You know I don´t agree with you reverend, I say as I put my fork down. There is no god, if there was we wouldn´t be outlaws. Davey and Mac would be alive and we wouldn´t be killing people for money . You out of all people should know that. 

  
\- People always has a choice Alice, you can always try to be a better person.

  
\- A better person, like you? Are you a rolemodel, man of god? I don´t know reverend, sometimes it feels good to be bad. Too good. 

  
I look at Micah.

  
\- God will catch up with us all in time. Good Night both of you. Swanson walks away.

  
\- Good Night , don´t let the bed bugs bite you Reverend, Micah says laughing at him.

  
He looks at me

  
\- Well , I didn´t expect to hear that from you Alice. The ooonly one in camp that I can agree with is you.. Hellfiiire...

  
\- You don´t know me Micah, I say as I finish my meal. 

  
-Then why don´t you come with me and Bill tomorrow robbing that stagecoach he´s been jappin about all day? We could use an innocent looking girl standing by the road.

  
I glare at him and he is smiling at me. I know he is testing me.

  
\- F'ck you Micah, I always bring my guns to robberies. Innocent acting to lore the coachdrivers , you have the other girls for that. You bring me you bring a gun!

  
\- Alright alright he says and puts his hands up. We´ll leave in the morning, Bill and I will let you know when.

\- Bye nooow he says as he stands up and walk away.


	5. Chapter 5

\- You ready Alice , Micah says.

He´s standing by Baylock, wearing his read shirt and long black coat.

  
\- Sure is, I say as I get on my horse.

  
I´m wearing my beige and white dress with my darkblue thin coat. 

  
Bill walks up to us, with a sour face as always:

  
\- Now I don´t want any unnesserary shooting or fighting, we get the money and then get away from there. Split up and then regroup back here. Is that clear?

  
\- I´m so exited Bill LETS GOO!! I say and make my horse trample in its place wanting to ride away.

  
The robbery went smooth, Bill held the driver at gunpoint while Micah forced the guards and passengers out of the coach. I robbed them while Micah went for the stash of money hidden under the seats.

A man tried to grab me to get away, so I smashed my gun in his face and threw him on the ground.

We managed to get away just as the driver reached for his rifle by his seat and we heard the shots being fired at us.

The feeling was magical. I laughed so hard I almost couldn´t see where I was riding.

Bill screamed at us to part ways, so i steered my horse to the right and rode as fast as I could.

I laid low for a few hours, counting the stack of money I had and drinking my whiskey.

I decided to head to Rhodes before going back to camp. I stopped at the fence and sold the pocketwatches and jewelry. Rode past the church and stopped by the general store to look at a new dress. Decided not to buy one. Maybe next time. _(Oh well back to camp.)_

I walk out the store and up to my horse. I stop when i see Baylock. I look up and of course sees Micah.

  
\- Well well if it isn´t myyy buddy ? Micah smirks at me.

  
.-....Mr Bell i say looking up at him. You ready to go back to camp?

  
\- Why in such a hurry girley, can´t I buy you a whiskey first? Or a bath maybe if you feeling dirty from the road? Huh? 

  
He knows exactly what he´s doing right now, such a bastard. 

  
\- Uum...ahh sure Micah, a whiskey please. Show me the way to the parlourhouse sir, I say and wink.

  
Micah doesnt notice my wink, he just rides past me showing the way. 

  
I lead my horse to the parlour house.

  
Micah walks in front of me inside to the bar and orders two bottles of whiskey... 

  
\- Sit where you like , doll, he says to me. 

  
I choose a table near a window. I sit down expecting Micah to sit opposite me. But instead he sits down next to me, closing me in from the crowd, pouring me a shot of whiskey .

I down the shot and put the glass down asking him to pour me another. He complies. 

\- Sooo Alice, did you enjoy my company today? I saw you hitting that fella right over his face. Makes you feel good doesn´t it?

  
\- It made me feel so good Micah you wouldn´t even know, I say and I make a loud sigh.

  
\- Ohhh i know Alice, I knooow just how that feels. Makes you feel alive it does, he says as he raises his shot of whiskey. I do the same and we drink. 

  
Micah drinks more than me so he gets drunk and starts rambling on about his past. 

  
\- My father was wanted in five states he was , FIVE! He was a wild horse I tell yah... a wiiild horse. 

  
\- Just like you? I ask

  
He looks hurt at my words for a second, his expression change in his face.

  
\- Tell me about your brother, I finally say. 

  
\- Amos? Nothing to say really. 

  
He sits up in the chair. 

  
\- He´a chaaanged maan apparently, he says with a mocking tone.. Lives in california with his wife and children. Yellow as pissed on snow I tell ya

  
_(damn does he sound bitter)_

  
He pours some more whiskey.

  
\- Damn it Micah, if that´s what you say about your brother, I do not wanna get on your bad side, I say with a laugh. 

  
\- Well that depends Alice, how much you irritate me.

  
He raises a eyebrow

  
\- Irritate you? I thought you liked me, _i joke._

  
\- Oh I do like you Alice. I do. you´re....different.

  
He looks at me and I can tell he´s holding back.

  
\- Oh my god Micah you sure know how to compliment women, I shake my head. 

  
\- Hush woman, he says and laughs. Know your place, don´t talk back at mee. 

  
\- Excuse me?

  
\- See, you aaare pretty full of yourself. 

  
His tone is serious but I think he´s trying to be funny

  
\- I AM NOT I say with drunken emotions. 

  
We are too drunk to notice we are drunk and talking more than we should. 

  
\- You are! Ya think you´re untouchable and wouldn´t even show a man some emotion. I´m tryin my best here. I expect you to do the same.

  
\- Yeah..welll.. I have my reasons MICAH.... I don´t like to explain myself.

  
I stay quiet for a while to look out the window.

  
\- Cheer up, i´m only teasin with ya. Isn´t that what we do? Teeease eachother? huh? he says with a nervous tone

  
\- We sometimes push things too far though I say still looking out the window. 

  
\- Ahhh, It´s just the merry dance of men and women, just how it is. I don´t want to explain myself either. See Alice, we´re alike you and me. 

  
He puts his fists up

  
\- Two wild outlaws ready for action, am I right? 

  
\- I don´t know Micah i say, _feeling sober now._ You´re being kinda rude, just like a few days ago. 

  
He stares at me, unable to know what to do. He gets up and then walks away, up to the bar. 

  
_Great, now he´s gonna order another bottle. I need to get out of here. But when he comes back, he brought a plate , not a bottle. It´s a plate of berry cobbler! He bought me a dessert!?_

  
\- Here you are, eat it. ....Im... sorry....or...something.... he says under his breath, not looking at me.

  
I eat the plate clean and he finishes the second bottle of whiskey.

We leave the parlourhouse in silence. Once again he walks infront of me. 

  
_Why is this so awkard for both of us? Why can´t we act like normal people?_

  
I try to walk his speed but i can´t keep up.

  
\- Micah, I´m too drunk for this, sloow dooown. Please!

  
The word **_please_ **stops him. He turns around. 

  
\- Thank you Mr Bell, I say

  
_I´m waay to polite while drunk_

  
\- Stop talking, he says to me.

  
\- What? 

  
\- I saaaid stop talking woman!

  
\- You can´t talk to me like that Micah I say surprised and take one step forward.

  
He looks at me. I look back at him. 

  
_I am drunk yes. And I should know better. Still I reach up and give him a kiss on the cheek._

  
\- Thank you Micah, I say. For the whiskey and the berry cobbler. 

  
I hold my hand at his face. I pull it away ready to ride back to camp.

  
Micah grabs my hand and yanks me against him, and kisses me, i let him kiss me. I let him kiss me deeply and we kiss for a long time.

Then he pulls away, goes to Baylock and starts riding off. I quickly mount my horse and ride up to him.

  
\- Whats wrong with you, I yell at him. Wait for me!?

  
I kick the horse to ride faster and we race back to camp. Again I laugh loud and hard , I always do this when I ride fast, it makes me feel alive.

The night air is a bit cold and it feels so good on my face.

We reach camp and go our seperate ways.

I hear Bill talking to Micah about todays robbery asking why we are late. I don´t hear what they say next as I go to my tent, turning in for the night.


	6. Chapter 6

Micah likes being alone. He preferres it. After his father was killed and Amos left him to go to California, he lived alone for a few years. Moving from town to town. But he´s older now and understands that a lone wolf is more likely to be killed than if you´re in a pack. Besides, the money stuck in Blackwater are too valuable to leave behind. He is far to invested with Dutch to just leave.

_He takes a sip of his whiskey_

"A cold blooded killer", is what his daddy tought him to be. No feelings, just do what you have to do. Kill or be killed. On the run. Never stop for nothing or no one. **No one**.

He repeats that thought in his head. **No one**. He takes pride in that. Only trusting himself, never depending on anyone. Never have a woman occupied his mind for more than one night. It was easy , a fling here and there, just filling his needs. And he never had to force anyone. But he made sure to say or do something awful to push them away afterwards. He wanted to hate them.

"Don´t be weak, don´t let a woman tell you what to do", he repeats his fathers words. **Don´t be weak**.

_Lenny walks by and they nod at eachother. Lenny is the camp guard this evening._

Well, he was weak yesterday. Couldn´t resist Alice. The way she thanked him, like he was a good person. How _she_ first kissed _him_ , like he was worthy of that light touch. F*king bitch. Who does she think she is huh? Teasing him like that, smiling at him? And Dutch said she had turned down Javier. Javier!? But she kissed him yesterday outside the parlour house.. why him?

_He walks over to the camp fire._

Just like every night he alternates between sitting at the camp fire and sitting at the outskirts of camp. And by morning he drinks his morning coffee by the scout fire, talking to whoever had the night shift. It´s now deep in to the night but Sean is still up and talks to Uncle. Micah starts to clean his weapons again, out of habit, not inviting to a conversation. He doesn´t notice that Alice has joined. She and Uncle are laughing with Sean now.. . He notices that the glow from the fire makes her features look golden and soft, and her hair is down and freshly brushed. She meets his stare and smiles at him, and he gets mad inside.. He aint sure if he´s mad at himself or her. Don´t be weak , he reminds himself. **D.o.n.t b.e. w.e.a.k.** _Trust no one._


	7. Chapter 7

I could not stop laughing when Bill, Arthur and Dutch came back to camp a few hours ago. Apperently they have been become deputes in Rhodes now. Helping out sheriff Gray. _Oh my god, where does the madness end?_ Apperently there is a treasure somewhere, belonging to either the Braithwaites or the Grays. 

  
Me and John went out scouting the area surronding Braithswaite Estate but couldn´t find anything interesting. It ended with us going to the Parlour House and drinking some whiskey and talking instead.  
Apperently Dutch didn´t mind that we came back with "nothing", he was far more amused that he had tricked Sheriff Gray today. 

\- Alice! Hey Alice! Aaaaliiiiice!?  
Sean is screaming at me from the poker table . John, Uncle, Hosea and Micah are sitting with him ready to play.  
I walk over to them.  
\- We need one more, you in?   
\- Sure Sean, I´m in! 

  
I sit down between John and Uncle. Always best to sit in between them as they are always arguing with each other. But it´s all talk, deep down they like each other, I´m sure of it.

  
Micah is surprisingly good at playing poker, winning two hands in a row. Hosea and Uncle are the best of course, years and years of training. And Hosea being a conman makes me wonder if he isn´t bluffing in every round we play. 

  
\- So Alice, how was the robbery with Bill and Mr Bell here? You didn´t kill too many poor souls I hope? I mean you went with the two most trigger-happy fools in this camp? 

  
I laugh at what Sean just said, but Micah doesn´t look happy.

  
\- I´m sure Alice makes the decision herself who she robs with, Micah spits back at Sean.

  
\- Of course Micah, I meant that Alice was the third trigger-happy fool here. You make a lovely trio. But exclude Bill next time huh? Then you´d be the greatest outlaw-couple me eyes have seen from here back to Ireland. 

  
I laugh again, and Micah seems angry now.

  
\- Put your money where your mouth is kid, start playing poker you fool.

  
\- Alice, have you told Micah about that time when you and Davey went to that church to rob the church-cheest and you-

  
I interup him:

  
-What the hell is wrong with you Sean!?! 

  
\- Lets just play poker, John says annoyed. I´ve hade enough of you two. Damnit!

  
I take sips from my whiskey, not wanting to be sober anymore. The more we drink the better we become at poker apperently. Hosea is the first to leave, being too tired. John is the night guard so he disappears some time after. Uncle wins the all the money, and Sean and him starts drinking heavy. Talking and rambling the night away. 

  
I stand up and Micah is standing up too. I walk over to him and asks him to follow me. I walk down to the shore, walking past the girls wagon and towards the boat wreck.   
I turn around but I don´t see Micah.

I lean my back on a tree, looking up in to the night sky. The stars are out. The air is crisp. Just like when we kissed in Rhodes. He has been avoiding me since then. He probably regrets what happened, or he just kissed me to shut me up. I take som deep breaths and closes my eyes.

  
-Why did you want me to follow you? 

  
\- Micah! I didn´t hear you walking over. Thank you. I mean... I´m sorry. I´m....damnit...I´m drunk...

  
This makes Micah laugh low in his chest, I almost doesn´t hear it.

  
\- Why do you want me here? he changes his tone to a serious one.

  
\- You´ve been avoiding me so I wanted to talk to you about it.

  
\- Did you now? he says unconvinced.

  
\- Whats with the attitude Micah? Why can´t you be nice for once? _~~This is not the way to start a conversation~~_

  
\- For what? For you? Do you want me to be someone I´m not just to make you happy? 

  
\- I give up Micah, I say and walk past him. Why did i even bother.....

  
\- Wait! Come back here!

  
I turn around

  
\- Why? All I do seems to annoy you. 

  
I wait for him to say something. The camp is quiet and the only one awake other than me and Micah is John who is on the other side of camp standing guard.

  
\- Sean better watch his mouth, Micah finally says.

  
I start to walk back to him, wanting to explain Sean´s behavior.

  
\- I don´t know why he said those things. I´m sorry, I say.

  
\- What did you and Davey do at the church? _Micah´s voice is cold_

  
\- The what? Me and Davey? 

  
\- Answer me damnit! Micah raises his voice

  
\- Micah , Sean was only messing with you , pushing your buttons.

  
\- Tell me Alice. You better tell me.

  
\- Sean is just messing with you Micah. He just made that up.

  
\- Why?

  
I say this while looking away from him:

  
\- Because....well.... I hesitate.

  
He walks up to me:

  
\- Sean wants me to stay away from you, is that it? Or did you ask him to say those things so I would stay away from you. Which one is it huh?

  
\- Sean was in Rhodes....that day we robbed the coach...

  
\- So? 

  
Micah looks confused. I get nervous and starts rambling on.

  
\- He said he went to the gunstore to buy arrows for some reason. I don´t know why, when did Sean ever need arrows? Have you seen Sean with a bow and arrow since you joined us? He bought whiskey from the general store even though we have it here in camp. He stayed in Rhodes until the evening apperently.. _~~Stop rambling Alice~~_

  
-Ok? What does this have to do with you and Davey?

  
\- NOTHING Micah, Sean made that up! I already explained that!

  
\- Again, WHY?

  
\- Cause he saw you and me kissing . That´s why Sean was acting the way he was tonight, just trying to make me blush and make you angry. I swear Micah, tomorrow I´m gonna hit him. He is such an idiot sometimes. He loves the fact that we are arguing right now, the irish bastard. F'cking idiot!

  
\- So? You think I care?

  
\- I guess not?

  
\- But he better watch his mouth or he will be sorry.

  
\- You and me both I say and laugh.

  
\- God damnit, you guys scared the crap out of me! John interups! Why are you out here? Go to sleep!

  
\- Hey John, we were just talking I say to him.

  
\- Yeah yeah John says and walks past us.

  
We are quiet, no one says anything for a while.

  
-Micah are you still here, I can´t see a damn thing!?

  
\- I´m still here darling, he says and grabs my arm.

  
\- Come closer so I can see you Micah, closer to the shore where there is some light.

  
\- You sure are a demanding woman, he says with a laugh 

  
\- You don´t know the half of it Mister Bell. I say with a tone of amusement.

  
-Oh it´s Mister Bell all of a sudden he says, and puts his hands on my waist squising me. 

  
\- If you want. I say and wink

  
\- Hush woman, he says.

  
I lift his hat away, tossing it on the sand. I take my hands on both sides of his face and comb through his hair. He closes his eyes when I´m through combing and grab his hair, tugging sofly.

  
His hands makes their way to my back, and he pushes me closer to him. I rest my hands on his chest. He moves his left arm to touch my face and leans in to kiss me. He backs me in to a treestump and grabs one of my legs and pushing his hips closer to me. I moan. He smiles and chuckles.

  
\- Shut up and kiss me, I say breathing heavily.

  
He makes his way down my neck, kissing and nibbling between my shoulder and neck, opening two shirt buttons as he goes along.   
I look up at the sky, the stars and moon are shining at us, and I´m so happy to be alive. I feel alive for once, I feel like anything is possible. I feel Micah kissing me, caressing me. Finally. 

  
I push his face back up to kiss him on the mouth again. 

  
-Please don´t ignore me again, I say as I kiss his neck.

  
\- I won´t darlin he says and pinches my waist.

  
We don´t go further than that this evening. After a while he walks me back to camp, to my tent. I kiss him on the mouth thanking him for tonigt. He kisses me back and saying goodnight. I want to invite him in to sleep next to me but I know he doesn´t sleep very often so I change my mind. I don´t want to come across as needy either so I let him set the pace of this. Or maybe I´m reading to much in to tonight. Maybe he will be ignoring me tomorrow. Maybe not. Either way, Sean is getting an earful tomorrow. 


	8. Chapter 8

Sean and I talket it out. He doesn´t like Micah, and I accept that. John hasn´t mentioned that he met me and Micah that night and I won´t remind him. I suspect the whole camp know though.

  
Micah hasn´t been in camp this whole week. He said he was going to his camp near Strawberry. No one knows what he´s doing there, but he always brings back money and loot so Dutch never questions it. 

  
Arthur and Lenny had a run-in with Lemoyne Raiders. They got away with moonshine and rifles. Arthur let me have a rifle as they lost mine fleeing Blackwater. I sit with Lenny and Arthur at the scoutfire talking for a long time. Lenny is really bright, and talks alot with Hosea about his future. But he is, just like the rest of us, without support from his real family so it´s hard to be out in the world alone. The gang is our family so it´s hard to leave. I totally understand him. 

  
A part of me wants to scream to Lenny to leave as fast as he can, just like I wished someone did to me at that age. Some days I trust Dutch with my life, and sometimes I see a glimse of doubt in his eyes. The Blackwater incident really scarred Arthur and Hosea, they have lost a little faith in Dutch, I can see that.

  
Arthur is the most loyal man I´ve ever met. The things he gone through, the chances he had, and he´s still loyal to Dutch and Hosea. Some things he couldn´t choose, but Mary for example , he left the gang for her a few times. I like Mary, but maybe they aren´t meant to be together. 

  
When me and Arthur are left alone at the scountfire, he starts to talk about Micah:

  
\- I don´t like that you´re with Micah. Why him?

  
\- Arthur, I know you don´t like him, you and everyone else it seems.

  
\- Except Dutch, Arthur says with a sigh

  
-Yeah well, I´m my own person , and I get to choose who I´m with and who I rob and who I shoot.

  
\- I know I know.. - When he hurts you, you let me know and I will teach him a lesson, just like I did to that Matthew fella you and Hosea worked with?

  
\- _When_ he hurts me? Why would you say such a thing? 

  
\- Sorry, I just don´t trust him. 

  
\- I can take care of myself Arthur. 

  
\- I´m sure you can, he says with a smile.

  
\- Thank you Arthur. 

  
\- For what?

  
\- For staying. You´ve had your chanses of getting away but you still return.

  
\- I´m a fool , you know that. 

  
He says this as he stands up

  
-I´ll catch you later Alice, he says as he walks away.

  
Later that day, Micah comes back to camp.

He goes straight to Dutch´s tent and sits there a long time. They have a lot to talk about. I sit by the poker table talking to Javier and Bill.

Dutch waves at me wanting me to come over.

  
-Alice my dear, come and have a seat, Dutch says as he takes my hand as I approach his tent.

  
-Micah, you´re back! How was your trip?

  
-It was good darling, but I´m glad to be back. The area are swarming with O´driscolls now.

  
\- Talking about the O´driscolls Alice, Dutch says, You may want to tell Micah what you encountered near Valentine this week.

  
\- Wait, Valentine??? Why were you there? Micah questioning me.

  
\- I went there with John and Arthur, to see if they could collect the money for the sheep they sold right before you guys came here to Clemens Point.

  
Micah gives me a bad look. But I continue:

  
\- When we rode back, just below the mountains were a group of O´driscolls. They nearly shot Johns horse but we managed to attack them and not get shot. I got into a fistfight with one of them before he and another managed to escape. Guess who? 

  
Dutch cuts in:

  
-Colm f´cking Odriscoll is who she had a fistfight with! Can you belive that Micah? Colm?!

  
\- He could´ve had a knife you know? He would´ve hurt you.

  
\- I know, but I also had a knife Micah. I always come preperred. 

  
I lift my dress and show him my boots where in my left boot there is a small knife sticking up.

  
-Didn´t had to use it though. I say with a smile

  
-Aint that grand? Micah says a litle happier. He lifts his glass of whiskey, and he and Dutch drinks .

  
Molly comes over to the tent holding two plates of food. She´s smiling at me and giving me the look of "get out of here" but sweetly. I´ve talked to her a few times and she´s not so bad actually. She´s harmless.

  
I stand up and walks away from the tent. Micah grabs my arm:

  
-Hey sweetheart, can I talk to you?

  
-Sure. Lets walk down here.

  
We walk past Strauss wagon down to the water.

  
Micah looks nervous.

  
\- I...just wanted to ask if you.... I robbed these folks and I....

  
I smile at him to calm him.

  
-I was going to put these in the camp-chest, but maybe you would like some of the jewelry?

  
He holds upp the jewelry, a few rings, necklaces, pocketwatches.

  
-That one, can I have that? 

  
I point at a necklace; a black velvet band with a silver pendant.

  
-Absolutely doll. 

  
I unbutton some of my shirtbuttons asking him to help me to put the necklace on. I turn from him and hold my hair up. He puts the necklace on my neck and turns me around. 

-Let me look at you Alice. You are beautiful.

  
-If I remember correctly Micah, I think you said I was the most beautiful woman in this camp, I say smiling at him.

  
\- You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met in my life.

  
-Thank you Micah. I... that´s very nice of you to say...so thank you..

  
\- It´s the truth, he says, holds my arm and we walk back to camp. I button up my shirt so my necklace is hidden, this is our secret for now.

  
We spend the rest of the night sitting by the fire with everyone else . We act the same as before, Micah is cleaning his guns as usual, and I´m talking and singing with my friends. But when me and Micah make eye contact, I feel like he´s saying more to me than he could say in words. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know if you want more chapters right away. This is my first ever writing so feedback is more than welcome :)


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